Neon Indian

With a name like Neon Indian, you immediately demand my attention. Especially with my deep native american roots (not really). Who Neon Indian are, then, is an as yet unidentified duo from Austin/Brooklyn (although apparently the Austin connection is Alan Palomo from Vega/Ghosthustler) who have recently taken to producing a fine line in gauze-y, warped, psych infused Dream Wave/Hypnogogic Pop/Whatever it is people are calling it right now. The term I'm most fond of that they have been dubbed is perhaps "Glo-Fi".

Neon Indian delivers equal parts synthetic nostalgia, Dreampop lullabies, and grinding guitar noise to create something eerier than the sum of its parts. Not all too far away from M83's Saturdays=Youth, though not quite as 80s-esque, if you will. Neon Indian seems far more uncertain in its recollections. Perhaps it took some bad acid on the first weekend of year twelve and woke up 10 months later with no memory, a high school diploma, a new scar down its left calf and the nickname ‘melon fucker’.

Something about Neon Indian really grabs me. Not even entirely sure why, it's just kind of cool. I feel like it's supposed to be the theme music for those really late nights (or early mornings) for when things start to get really weird. That's right, new music to get weird to. You're welcome.

Neon Indian's debut Psychic Chasms is due October 13, 2009. Now go get weird.

I Should've Taken Acid With You - Neon Indian

6669 (I Don't Know If You Know) - Neon Indian


Twista ft. Kanye West: "Alright"

Click on the link to listen to a new track off of Twista's new Album "Category F5". This beat is the epitome of current hip-hop to me, from the tribal drums to the rising synth notes, it's everything a fan of the genre could ask for in my opinion. I know Twista may not say the most clever things in the world, but holy crap, dude can rap, and not enough people give him the credit he probably deserves. Oh, and Kanye's opening verse is insane, and has my new favorite line in it:

"N****s come by, talking 'bout they make it rain. I make that bitch Katrina"


The Twilight Zone

I didn't want to write this post out of fear of this turning into some kind of Twilight blog but I really don't have any hobbies/girlfriend/friends/bar doesn't open 'til 4, so I decided I would weigh in on the issue anyways.
Why are Justin Vernon and Thom Yorke writing music for Twilight? I have developed a few sound theories.

1) It's a joke. Maybe to these guys writing songs for Twilight is like a big, ironic joke. I compare to my wolf sweatshirt or APK's snow leopard tee. Do we really think they look cool and that people think we are badass and awesome for wearing them? Of course not. Do we think they are funny and hope other people think we are funny for wearing them? Well, yeah, they're fucking wolf shirts, man. Maybe Twilight is one big wolf shirt. Maybe Thom Yorke and Justin Vernon got together and said "You know what would be funny, if we wrote music for a movie that every junior high girl in America will see" and they are having a good laugh. Maybe the more alt you are, the more ironic a thing you have to do to get that feeling of smug self-satisfaction.

2) It's a science experiment. Alt people love Thom Yorke and things Thom Yorke loves and does. Some of them even watched the Grammys this year because he was there! The fucking Grammys! So, in the interest of science, some scientists (I'm looking at you Pistol P) did a science experiment where they took something alt people hate (mainstream fiction loved by junior high girls) and threw their supreme diety into the mix. This turn of events leaves people like those in the picture above confuses. "Wait," they say, "we don't like Twilight because its too mainstream and only idiots read it and we're cool and not idiots." "But," they continue, "Thom Yorke likes it, so it must be really good, maybe we should be into it." At this point, they either go buy the book or their heads explode. This is all a part of conspiracy to kill off weirdos or allow the vampires to take over I haven't decided yet. Also, I am anxious to see how the elitist indie blogosphere treats this one. "Well, it's the Twilight soundtrack, so no. But it's Thom Yorke and Bon Iver, so we kind of have to." It's like digging through dog crap to find the ring it swallowed, and Pitchfork's hands will never smell right again.

3) They are really big fans of the book. No, probably not. I take this one back.

4) They're in it for the money. Consider this: Radiohead let you pay what you wanted (i.e. FREE) for In Rainbows. Justin Vernon couldn't even afford to record For Emma in a real-life recording studio and had to do it in a crappy cabin in the woods. These two are obviously hard up for some coin, so when the Twilight folks came-a-courtin' they were more than willing to offer to write a few tunes. Unless, of course, they are taking the route I would take and demanding roles in the films as payment. If that's the case, the director shouldn't worry, what with Thom Yorke's pale skin and sunken eyes and Justin Vernon's wild beard and love of living in the forest they would make the perfect vampire and werewolf, respectively.

Probably gonna buy this soundtrack. Probably going to put it in my iTunes as "Rare Radiohead Demos" or "Bon Iver B-Sides" so people don't think less of me.

Thom Yorke and Bon Iver Write Songs For New Twilight Movie Soundtrack

This really isn't 'new' news and I really didn't necessarily want to post anything about it, but it's just so bizarre to me. Chris Weiitz, the director of both the first Twilight movie and the new one, New Moon, has confirmed that both Justin Vernon (Bon Iver) and Thom Yorke will be writing music for the upcoming sequel. Wow. At least those teeny bopper vampire loving girls will atleast have some decent tunes in their iTunes now I suppose (hopefully). Oh and if you don't know who Thom Yorke is, welcome to Earth. Are there any thoughts on this matter?


things that don't have to do with alcohol

photos taken by Kyle Martin

Tommy Bahama Shorts Are Comfy...Am I An Old Man?

Tommy Bahama shorts from eBay for something like $8. I am not even sure what drove me to buy these shorts and why I even searched eBay for some. I mean I know the stereotype of men who wear sir Tommy Bahama's line of clothing. Usually they have gray hair, a beer gut, hawaiian shirts buttoned halfway up, some '5 years ago they were cool' Oakleys or gradient aviator shades, a fat stogie in their mouth, and a girl 20 years younger than himself in one arm, and a classy drink in the other. No, in case you were wondering, I don't quite fit the stereotype.

When I was looking for a pair to buy, I saw some that said they were 'made of silk'. Now say what you will, but pants made of silk sound pretty good to me. Who wouldn't want a pair of silky droors to jump into on a hot summer day and I have to tell you, they feel good. So while I was home for the 4th of July, I was wearing my Tommy Bahama shorts, just minding my own business and sure enough, my older sister saw the label on them and ridiculed me for the remainder of the time I was home. I believe her remark was something like, "Are you wearing Tommy Bahama shorts? What are you like 40?" At the time, I was quick to brush it off with some smart ass comment about her snowbank colored skin, but later on after I got back to Omaha, something struck me. Am I an old man?

Now let's break it down. Here are some things that I own/do that I have had me to being accused of being an old man:

1. My velcro sneaks from Wally World. Okay, these are some of my favorite shoes that I own. They're $10 and as comfortable as any of the Air Jordans or Sperrys I own. Even my Rainbow flip flops can't compare. I realize that they're velcro, but I've just been trying to bring them back. Does it help that I have a pair of high dollar velcros from the UK? I think that as long as I can still wipe my own ass while wearing them, I shouldn't be called grandpa.

2. My flannel 'Elmer Fudd' hunting hat and overall older looking array or wintery apparel. This hat is the warmest, most functional hat ever. Ear flaps and a bill? That's where versatility meets functionality. Yet I am accused of being an old man for wearing it. This also goes for my mad bomber hat. I also like flannels and boots in the winter time. I feel that I'm just dressing appropriately for the weather and they ask me where the lumberyard is. One arguement I may make is that flannels have become somewhat of a hipster artifact this past year or so. We're not even going to go into the 'long-johns'.

3. Sitting around the house all morning in my underwear eating cereal watching Sports Center/Andy Griffifth/Everybody Loves Raymond...Dammit...I'll come back to trying to defend this one later.

4. Using my all-black framed reading glasses while on the computer for more than 15 minutes. I actually have quite acute vision (20x20). My eyes just get a little tired from looking at screen for a little while. I can't really control this. Though my glasses are a bit old-fashioned, they once again are functional. I feel like I'm having to use that saying a lot as a bit of a cop out.

5. I smoke a tobacco from a pipe. I'm not sure if it's Gandalf's fault or just some old bastard sitting on his stoop smoking a pipe and itching his wrinkly old nuts waiting for the newspaper, but somewhere down the line it was said that old guys smoke pipes. I have come to the conclusion that it must just be one of those things you do as the older you get, the wiser you get. There's no denying that the flavor of the tobacco is at it's best smoking a pipe. Maybe these old guys know what they're doing after all.

So these are some of the reasons why I have been accused of being somewhat of an old man and part of the reason I woke up this morning and asked myself while I was watching Matlock eating Fruity Pebbles in my underwear, "Shit, am I an old man?" If these are things that make me an old man, then so be it. I'm not willing to part ways any of them. Not even my crew socks with grey toes and heels.

Loose Skin and Old Balls

Lately, I’ve been catching a lot of heat for spending too much time and money in various bars, taverns and liquor stores, along with a seemingly complete disregard for my personal health and well-being. Fact: I go out and drink to belligerence on an average of four nights a week. Myth: this means I have a drinking problem. All this really means is I just turned 21 and I have nothing better to do with my time/money. However, I can’t help but heed a few small words of caution when I look down the bar and see my 47 year-old, twice-divorced former high school business teacher, slouching over the bar, drinking a pitcher of Busch Light identical to the several I usually split with my erstwhile compadre Aaron. Likewise, I can’t help to feel a jolt of terror when he says something like, “You remind me of myself 20 years ago.” This is one of those “Oh, fuck” moments, and it left me doing some thinking. How old is too old? This soul searching has given us the following age gauge of some of my favorite things.

Keystone Ice- I have a special place in my heart for this 5.9% ABV beverage. It always seems to heighten my charm and lower my awareness, but I recognize that there has to be a point where it’s no longer appropriate. When you get a job that pays an annual salary rather than by the hour, you have to stop buying Keystone Ice. If you get fired from your salaried position and return to by-the-hour employment, you probably didn’t stop drinking Key Ice, so feel free to enjoy the black-canned menace.

Wednesday Nights at the Jay- This one is tricky because everyone loves cheap drinks and even cheaper underage girls, so it might be hard to tear yourself from the mid-week festivities at everyone’s favorite ghetto tavern. To avoid becoming the strangely awkward, Boulevard drinking dude with the receding hairline follow this guideline: after you graduate, you have one (1) year in which it is still acceptable to go to the Jay on Wednesday night. If you are pursuing post-grad studies in Omaha, this limit is extended to two (2) years. These rules exclude any alumni gathering in which large numbers of your classmates will be in your company. Unless you graduated in, like, 1973. That’s too fucking old and you’re embarrassing your children.

Using a MacBook- I have a MacBook Pro and my dad has an HP. I feel like this is the most striking and comprehensive distinction that can be made between Apple and PCs. It's not that my dad isn't "hip" or that he's "uncool". It's just that he doesn't need a Mac because...well he just doesn't. For some reason, I find it hard to believe that Apple is directing their advertising towards the 45+ set. I really struggled to find a set of concrete parameters to nail down on this one, and I finally boiled it down to what I'm going to call the Reverse Mustache Rule. The Mustache Rule states that you are not allowed to grow a mustache unless you have children or you're a cop. The Reverse Mustache Rule, when applied to MacBooks, stipulates that you are not allowed to buy a MacBook if you have kids. If you're going to blow a wad of cash on something that might make you seem younger, buy a fucking Camaro. It's more practical and it'll get you more bitches than the computer. Trust me.

Shotgunning- My preferred method of beer delivery is trademarked by the sharp punch of a car key on aluminum, the crack of a tab, and a few seconds of glorious slurping. Sounds awful in writing, but it is awesome in application. As much as I love shotgunning, I once had a vision of myself as an old man, gulping Ensure through a car (probably something sensible, nothing flashy) key sized hole at the base of its can. A true nightmare. But when to stop? Follow this rule of thumb: since keys are integral to the process of shotgunning, they are also the yardstick against which propriety is measured. When you take out your keychain to punch the hole, count the keys. If you have five or more keys, don’t shotgun. You clearly have too much responsibility to end up a shirtless, raving drunk lording over the foosball table.

Putting music on the jukebox- There is nothing I hate more than people putting shitty music on the jukebox. The people that do is are either old, tasteless, or dumb, or, in the case of the girl who puts in 5 dollars at a time and never leaves the “Most Played” screen, an old, tasteless dumbass. If I’ve just invested three dollars in a beer-drinking summer soundtrack of Animal Collective, Vampire Weekend, and Lupe Fiasco, I don’t want it to be followed with Nickelback or—for Christ’s sake—“You Shook Me All Night Long”. If you have purchased fewer than thirteen (13) albums in the last year, stay away from the jukebox. Also, if you have bought more than three (3) albums on CD in the last year, leave the tunes to someone else and, uh, buy a fucking computer.

Wearing tank tops- Never. Never, ever, fucking never should anyone wear a tank top.

Wearing your fraternity’s letters- No matter how much you love your brothers and want to cherish the good times you had, wearing your letters in public after graduation is only a few steps away from going back to the house and talking about how things were “in your day”, which is a small jump from showing up invited at recruitment events, which is a small push from thinking its ok to still party with college kids. Before you know it, you’ll be wearing your letters while pumping the keg at your high-school aged kids end of summer rager, in which at least one teenager will drive home drunk and someone will get pregnant in your guest room. DUI’s and bastard children are no joke, people, so keep the hoodie in the fucking scrapbook.

The Bulleted List, July 28

Accessories Which Give You Instant Credibility

  • Gun
  • Motorcycle
  • Bottle of malt liquor in paper bag
  • Mustache
  • Dark glasses
  • Long overcoat
  • Tattoo of a lion
  • Anduril, the Flame of the West


Fuck Science, Make Money

No offense to my compadre Pistol Pete, but I have few hangover cures of my own. It would be my pleasure to share them with those congregated, whether you want me to or not.

1) Drink to the point of puking. If you imbibe so much booze that your body forcibly purges your stomach, you're home clear. There is no way that the alcohol can spend the night stewing in my stomach and liver, plotting a way to give me a wicked headache and sensitivity to light, if I fire off a pre-emptive strike and leave the contents of my breadbasket in the empty lot beside the Rock'n Horse. It can't hurt me if it's on my shoes.

2) Go home with some skank. If you wake up next to a girl of either less-than-stellar looks or of questionable reputation, you will not spend much time lying in that bed. On the contrary you will be up and going in a flash. Rolling over in the morning and seeing a dragon or town bicycle will jump start your system to the point that you will be miles down the road before the naseau powers its way back through the adrenaline. This one is only moderately effective, and happens to often for all the good it does.

3) Eat a bag of Cheetohs. Seriously, it works for me everytime.

4) Never stop drinking. This is one of the most fail-safe methods of hangover prevention. A hangover is, by definition, the regrettable side effects a person feels after a night of heavy drinking. The loophole here is clear as day. Never let there be an after. Stay drunk. If the bar closes at 1, stay until 1. If you go to bed, set an alarm for every 2 hours, wake up and have a few beers. Bloody Marys for breakfast, a surreptitious mixed drink in your water bottle. Cocktails, cocktails, cocktails. If the train never stops moving, there's no way it can crash.

I don't know how this stacks up to Pete's "science" but its worked for me and--let's face facts--I'm awesome.

And drunk. Mostly drunk.

"I can't see the future,
but I know it's watching me."

-Annie Clark


The Hangover (not the movie)

As I sit here at 7:30 in the morning on a Saturday awoken by a pounding migraine(directly resulting from last nights activities), I began thinking about how often this has happened recently. I am sick and tired of waking up and begin forced to waste away good weekend hours that could be spent doing fun stuff because of a wicked hangover. My first thought is how do I get rid of this problem. Now you may be sitting at home and thinking, "Why doesn't this idiot just quit drinking?" Well to you I would say find another blog. Alcohol is a part of the college experience whether people like to admit it or not and will probably continue to be a part of mine and everyone who has anything to do with this blogs life for the foreseeable future.
So instead of focusing on quitting I'm focused on curing. The Hangover is one of the foremost ailments of me and my friends. So as a man who dreams of having a future in health care I see it as my duty to work for a cure for this sickness that confines partygoers to their beds until early afternoon.
I do not plan to do this by simply popping asprin or chugging a gatorade before I go to bed. My goal is to find the off the wall cures that are only rumored about and along the way come up with some of my own. In the end I hope that I will have compiled a list of a few things that really do take away the morning sickness that results from a night of drinking. Along the way I will keep you posted on what is working and what is making matters worse. I am going to avoid the other stand by of waking up and having a drink to kill the beast.
So after searching the internet for about ten minutes, the first five experiments I have decided to try are as follows
1) Saltwater - supposedly making an isotonic solution makes it easier for the body to process water, this may sound tame but I plan on drinking copious amounts of this stuff and seeing how fast I can get rid of the hangover
2) Jeeves Secret Concoction- 1 raw egg, worchestershire sauce, and tabasco and mix. Three things that I love separately but the thought of them together is scary . Of all the morning drinks this one sounds the most off the wall and thus it must be tried.
3) 6 pack and a pound- Last night I watched two friends split the Taco Johns epic meal deal and I think it would be a great thing to test. More than anything else I hope this one works.
4)Pedialyte- Yes that wonderful drink that parents give their kids who have diarhea has made the list. This one is off internet suggestion and I will be drinking it before I hit the hay
5) Lemon Pits- I guess that the Puerto Ricans have a tradition that says if you rub a lemon in your arm before going out for a night of binging that you will wake up with no residual effects
A few others that will likely be tried... $2.99 pancakes at harrahsat 2am, Brandeis breakfast, a shot of bacon grease
So I guess we will see how this goes. Heres to Science.


Death Cab's "Little Bribes" Video

When I hear the words "fan-made video" they conjure thoughts of a lame-ass youtube slideshow of some guy and his buddies doing kegstands while a Kid Rock song blares in the background. Then I saw this beast. Ross Ching made a music video for a track called "Little Bribes" off Death Cab's recent "The Open Door" EP, and not only does it fail to suck ass, it is crazy cool. So cool in fact, that after it stormed the interweb and the band saw it, they contacted Mr. Ching and made it the official video of the song. So click on the title of this post to watch it and wish you were Ben Gibbard and got cool indie chicks like Zooey Deschanel.

More Books and School-type Stuff

I like zombies and one time I read Pride and Prejudice so a girl would think I was a sensitive, intellectual-type. So, when I heard the Internet hype-machine buzzing about Seth Grahame-Smith's Pride and Prejudice and Zombies I felt obligated to pick up a copy.
To me, the idea of mashing up Jane Austen's comedy of manners with comic book style living dead violence is hilariously groundbreaking. It's like Victorian England meets World War Z meets The Hood Internet. Fuck, I love living in the 2000s.
As for the book itself, I only have this to say: too much witty banter, not enough heads getting chopped off. The plot of P and P remains relatively whole and intact, with wry, zombie-related snips being snuck in across the pages. After a particularly sassy exchange with Darcy, Elizabeth goes off and shoots some mo'fuckers in the head. Awesome, but not quite awesome enough.
The idea behind this creation is novel at best, a one-time flash in the pan, but a textual mash-up becoming this popular is a literary frontier. Don't expect to see War and Peace and Werewolves or Crime and Punishment and Pirates any time soon, but P&P&Z is definitely taking literature in very cool directions.

We live in a glorious age.


Stronghand's Book Club

I know what you may be thinking, but the shocking answer to your question is yes, we actually do read (80% of us do anyway). On my recent sojourn down to Mexico I read a lovely tome by Jonathan L. Howard called Johannes Cabal the Necromancer. This is his first novel and to be honest I bought it mostly for the boss cover art, but I could not have been more pleasantly surprised. The essential premise is that long ago, Johannes sold his soul to the devil in order to learn the secrets of necromancy. However, he soon found that the absence of a soul took a vital variable out of his experiments, rendering them useless. So he decides to make a wager with Satan Himself. In exchange for getting his soul back, Johannes must collect 100 replacement souls for Satan's baseball-card-esque collection in one year. If he fails to do so, he will lose not only his eternal soul, but, more tangibly, his life. So, with the help of a sinister and remarkable traveling carnival that His Unholiness provides he sets out on his diabolical mission. Johannes enlists a cast of outlandish characters to aid him, most notably his estranged vampire brother Horst, to aid him along the way and the results are thoroughly entertaining. Every member of this spectacular carnival of death is unique, and Howard should be commended for making them so accessible and likable. The writing itself is clever, expressive, and refreshingly structured. I'll stop raving as to avoid giving anything away, but just trust me and read this book (yes, Kyle, even you).

Bonus Bulleted List, July 23

Phrases I Would Love To Appear In a Book About My Life

  • "...beer and taco enthusiast..."
  • "...a particularly good looking hobo fortune teller..."
  • "...last seen chugging a bottle of Boone's Farm..."
  • "...exceptionally adroit with throwing stars..."
  • "...hubris was one of his more endearing qualities..."
  • "...the natives erected a totem pole in his likeness..."
  • "...astride a tame polar bear..."
  • "...in defiance of the village elders..."
  • "...a role model..."

"I’ll gamble away my fright and I’ll gamble away my time and in a year, a year or so this will slip into the sea."
— Zach Condon, Beirut


The Bulleted List, July 21

Things I Like About Taylor Swift

  • Gender neutral name
  • Ability to rhyme "sneakers" and "t-shirts" with other words
  • Incorporates Nathaniel Hawthorne's finest work into lyrics
  • Hangs out with T-Pain
  • Hates the Jonas Brothers
  • Hot


Grizzly Bear on Letterman (again)

Grizzly Bear appeared on David Letterman last night, after having been booted earlier in May due to the show running too long. They performed a lovely version of "Ready, Able" from the new album with the ACME orchestra blending beautifully.

Ready, Able - Grizzly Bear


Stream The Dodos' Time To Die (in it's entirety)

I haven't checked, but I am going to have to assume that The Dodos upcoming album, Time To Die, has leaked. It would be my reason to guess this because you can now stream the entire album for free at http://timetodie.net/. When you visit the site, they have a little video for you thanking you for coming to the site instead of downloading the leak. Also they're moving up the digital release date to help ease the pain of the losses as Time To Die will be available at the Amazon MP3 store on 7/28.

Fables - The Dodos

The Bulleted List, July 14

Phrases I Rarely Use

  • Yes, Officer, I will fully cooperate.
  • I could get in trouble for this.
  • No thank you, I've had enough to drink already.
  • I think I'll refrain from commenting on this situation.
  • Are you 18?
  • I'm sorry.
  • One Bud Light, please.


Grizzly Bear x Lil Wayne

For some reason, Grizzly Bear seems to be the artist of choice for a lot of rap mashes as of late. Well at least we can listen to an alternative to the original "Prom Queen" song by Lil Wayne. This mash-up of "Two Weeks" and "Prom Queen" almost justifies Lil Wayne writing it. This song comes from a 3 song mash-up EP called veckaFlyest which has two other Lil Wayne/Grizzly Bear mash-ups.

Grizzly Bear x Lil Wayne - 2 Weeks til' Prom


Wale's Album Debut Gets Release Date

Finally, after having done two highly accoladed mixtapes (Mixtape About Nothing and Back To The Feature) the white (no, not "white) hot rapper from D.C. is finally ready to put out an official album through the label Allido/Interscope. The album's title is Attention: Deficit and will be released September 22, 2009.

It will include production from Mark Ronson, Cool and Dre, TV on the Radio's Dave Sitek, Sean C and LV, and Sleepwalkers, along with guests Bun B, Jazmine Sullivan, K'Naan, and Marsha Ambrosius.

Pretty Girls - Wale

The Bulleted List, July 9

Things I've Heard the Old People Talking About

  • the "football or baseball player down south whose girlfriend shot him in the damn head while he was taking a nap"
  • crabgrass
  • how they "never listened to Michael Jackson's music, but it must be good because he made a whole lot of money"
  • the merits of hitting your kids
  • how "that boy" made the coffee too strong this morning
  • Howard's new pacemaker