Big Moments, Part 1

I was looking back on my life today--as I often do--and I asked myself the age old question, 'How did I get here?' Here I am, 21 glorious years old, with a luscious head of hair and future full of promise, and as I reflected on the long path that brought me here, I realized that there were a few seminal occurrences that made me the man I am today. So, in the good spirit of a new year, I decided I'd share some of these 'big moments' in an ongoing series called 'Big Moments'. Hope you like it, show your mom.

Part 1: The First Time I Smashed Something



I was 8 years old the first time I participated in what is now one of my favorite pastimes: smashing things. My folks had just purchased a new TV (a 32" Sanyo, I believe) leaving our old television set (a completely inadequate 27" Phillips) sitting derelict on the back porch, waiting to go to the Dumpster. That's when my brother, aged 11, had one of the best ideas he has had in his life to date. Hey Mom, he said, can we take that TV and uh break it? Sure, my mom said, thus cementing her place in my heart forever, completing the process started by birthing and nurturing me. So, we took the old TV, drug it over to the trees by our house, raided the garage for hammers, crow bars, baseball bats, broomsticks, wrenches, I think a knife might have even worked its way in there. Shortly put, we armed ourselves to the teeth with anything we thought would be awesome to hit an old TV set with. Then, we waled on it. Oh man, did we wale on it. I was only 8, I could barely lift a crowbar, but when I drove the hook end of that iron bar through the glass of the screen, I knew I had found true love. We beat that TV with a savage rhythm. Those older TVs are full of parts and we smacked that TV around until everyone of those parts was strewn on the ground and shattered to bits. We beat it to bits, smashing the tiny pieces into the ground, and if we would have had some gas to dump on it and burn, I'm willing to say we would have done that to. People that do heroin say that the first time they shoot up is the best time, and every other time is just an attempt to recreate that feeling. Well, smashing things is pretty much the exact opposite of that. Every time you smash something, it's just as awesome as the first time or the second time or the third time. Seriously, you're destroying something with your bare (bear) hands; what could be better? So, that's why "The First Time I Smashed Something" was, in fact, a big moment in my life.